Is It Better to Adopt a Close Relative or Be the Legal Guardian?

How to Decide Between Adoption and Legal Guardianship

Roughly 8% of children in the U.S. live with family members who are not their biological parents. Though these familial arrangements can be a wonderful way of raising a child, they do come with some legal difficulties. If you are trying to decide between adoption or guardianship, here is what you need to know.

Adoption Is More Permanent

One of the big differences between adoption and guardianship is the length of commitment it entails. While many legal guardianships do continue until the child is 18, there is no guarantee the situation will last that long. Even if you are the legal guardian of a child, their legal parent still retains parental rights. They may be able to terminate the guardianship and regain custody of the child.

Meanwhile, if you become the adoptive parent of the child, all other parental rights are terminated. For all intents and purposes, you will be your young relative’s parent. No one can take the child without having to go through the lengthy process of proving you are an unfit parent in court. Furthermore, adoption lasts a lifetime. Unlike legal guardianship, you can still be the child’s next of kin, help them apply for financial aid, and perform other legal duties of a parent.

Legal Guardianships Are Often Simpler to Arrange

If you want to be the main caregiver for a young relative and act as a guardian, it is usually quite simple. All you have to do is fill out a few pieces of paperwork in court. Depending on the situation, the parent may be able to sign guardianship over to you, or you may just need to prove that the parent is unfit, and you can care for the child. In most cases, guardianship is something that can be set up in a day or two.

If you want to formally adopt a child, things get a little more complex. It is true that close relative adoptions, like grandparent adoptions, are simpler than traditional ones. However, it is still a multistep process. You’ll need to get the courts to terminate the parent’s rights and have your New Jersey adoption lawyer fill out paperwork to adopt the child. In many situations, the Department of Children and Families will also be involved. You may have to go through home studies and other steps to prove you are fit to adopt the child.

Legal Guardianship Has Different Custody and Child Support Rules

If you are a legal guardian, the child’s biological parent still has a lot of responsibility and rights. The court may order the parent to pay you child support while you care for the child. Furthermore, even if you have primary custody, the legal parent may have the right to visit the child regularly.

Depending on your family’s situation, this can be a good or bad thing. In some cases, you may want to avoid legal adoption because the child support you get helps pay for expenses. In other situations, you may be comfortable taking care of the child’s expenses and would prefer that no other parent has the right to seek partial custody or scheduled visitation.

Adoption Isn’t Affected by Changes to Your Marital Status

When you and your current spouse are caring for a child, it is important to consider how your relationship affects your legal arrangements. In the event of a divorce, legal adoption provides both parents with more rights. This happens because legal guardianship is usually only awarded to the biological family member. Even though a person’s spouse may act in a parental role, they will not automatically get guardianship alongside their partner.

This can lead to issues in a divorce because the nonbiological parental figure can end up without any access to the child. Adoptions give a little more security to both partners. Since each spouse would become the child’s adoptive parent, each spouse would have more rights if a divorce occurs.

As you can see, both legal arrangements have their own benefits. To find the right choice for your situation, it may be helpful to consult with a New Jersey adoption lawyer. At Cofsky & Zeidman, our team is happy to assist you, and we have offices conveniently located in Haddonfield and Woodbury.. We also have one in Philadelphia for our clients in that area. Schedule a consultation by filling out our contact form or by calling (856) 429-5005.

USCIS Makes It Easier to Transmit Citizenship to Children Born Abroad

What You Need to Know About the New USCIS Rules

There are roughly 9 million U.S. citizens currently living abroad. Typically, they are able to transfer their citizenship to any children they have, but things get a little more complicated when reproductive assistance is involved. Fortunately, a recent update from USCIS makes it much easier for parents to give their child U.S. citizenship.

USCIS Announces Changes to Citizenship Rules for Children Born Abroad

U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) is typically responsible for handling citizenship matters for children born in other countries. Previously, their rules allowed biological children of U.S. citizens or step-children of U.S. citizens to gain citizenship. However, the rules were a little vague, so it left some children in a legal gray area.

 

A few months ago, USCIS updated its rules to clarify that children born of assisted reproductive technology (ART) can also apply for citizenship. As long as the U.S. citizen is married to the child’s genetic or gestational parent, they can transfer citizenship to that child. This allows families to give their child citizenship even if the child was conceived through sperm donors, surrogate pregnancies, or other ART means.

What the New Rules Will Mean for International Families

This new rule will simplify the citizenship application process for international families. Before the update, parents of children conceived with ART could usually only get their child citizenship if they formally adopted the child. This added extra paperwork and visits with New Jersey adoption lawyers when parents were trying to visit the United States or ensure their child has all the rights of a U.S. citizen. Many struggled because their country of residency counted them as a legal parent, but the U.S. saw them as neither a step-parent, adoptive parent, or biological parent.

 

With this new rule, non-traditional parents will have the same rights as other biological parents. For example, if a woman used donor sperm because her husband was sterile, the husband could still transfer his American citizenship to his child. The new rule just requires that the U.S. citizen be married to the person who carried the child or contributed genetic material to the child. As long as they meet this requirement, they can apply for naturalization and transmit their citizenship to their child.

How to Confirm Your Child’s Citizenship

If your family was created through ART, now is a great time to start formalizing their citizenship. If you’re abroad, try to visit the nearest U.S. embassy or consulate as soon as possible to file a Consular Report of Birth Abroad. This doesn’t start the official immigration process, but it makes the rest of the process easier.

 

When your child is born abroad and lives abroad, they don’t automatically get to come and go from the United States as they please. Instead, you will still need to undergo a brief version of the immigration process. This doesn’t require extensive documentation, tests, or waiting periods. Instead, it’s just a simple formality to legally recognize that your child is a U.S. citizen.

You’ll need to submit some documentation to show that your child is eligible for naturalization. Here are some of the things you will need to do:

  • Show that the child is your legal child in your current jurisdiction.
  • Provide the child’s birth certificate or other proof of identification.
  • Confirm you are married to the child’s genetic or gestational parent.
  • Give evidence of your own U.S. citizenship.
  • Show that at least one parent has proof of residency or continual presence in the U.S.

If you think the new USCIS rules will affect your family, consult with a New Jersey adoption lawyer. Cofsky & Zeidman is happy to examine your situation and help you figure out how to get your child citizenship. We have offices in Haddonfield and Woodbury, and our team assists with a variety of adoptions and assisted reproduction situations. Schedule a free consultation by calling 856-429-5005 or filling out our contact form.

Tips to Help Your Adopted Child Connect With His or Her Ethnic Culture

How to Honor Your Adopted Child’s Ethnic Culture

Eighty-four percent of international adoptions and 28% of domestic adoptions involve children joining families of another race or ethnic group. In any cross-cultural adoption, it’s important to find ways to honor a child’s heritage. These tips can help your child stay connected to his or her past and avoid a traumatic loss of identity.

Stay Educated on Cultural Topics

As soon as you start considering transracial adoption, you also need to start doing your research. As an adoptive parent, it’s your duty to learn about your child’s culture. Read books about the area, learn about its history online and try to meet people with a similar background. Strive to learn about the child’s holidays, foods, clothing, language, traditions and cultural attitudes. If possible, ask the child, or his or her biological family, about his or her culture.

Even though you can never know what it’s like to grow up in that culture, you can still obtain valuable information that can help your child later. As your child grows up, he or she will most likely have questions about his or her culture. Being educated ensures that your child can trust you to give him or her the right answers.

Encourage the Whole Family to Participate

If your adopted child is taking Chinese lessons while his or her other siblings are at soccer, he or she can end up feeling isolated. To keep your child from feeling singled out, try to get the whole family to participate. Doing things like making time to celebrate holidays, adding traditional foods to everyday dinners or watching foreign television shows can help your child feel a sense of pride and security in his or her heritage.

Try to include cultural traditions in day-to-day life instead of making them into occasional events. Incorporating these customs into your life can be very enriching for you as well. Embracing more traditions in your family can add variety and educational opportunities to your daily life.

Provide Opportunities to Socialize With People From Similar Backgrounds

All the fun celebrations with family at home cannot entirely make up for the sense of community your child may have lost. Making sure he or she can take part in activities with people who look like him or her and have similar memories can help your child feel more connected.

Try to look for cultural festivals, after-school programs or community events in your area. You may want to see if you can arrange playdates with children of a similar background as well. If your New Jersey adoption attorney helped you arrange an open adoption, it can be helpful to schedule meetings with the child’s biological parents or relatives. Having more representation of his or her culture helps your child stay connected to his or her heritage.

Don’t Put Too Much Pressure on Cultural Experiences

Though many cross-cultural adoptees report feeling like their parents prevented them from connecting with their culture, there are also plenty of other people who report resentment at being forced to take part in cultural activities. Especially if a child was adopted young or removed from a traumatic situation, he or she may not want to spend a lot of time thinking about his or her cultural heritage.

Celebrating an unusual holiday or eating exotic food can make a child feel further isolated or differentiated. If your child expresses these feelings, it’s important to acknowledge and accept them. Always allow your child’s unique preferences guide interactions, and let him or her know you are willing to help him or her connect with his or her culture if a different decision is made later.

For more ways to help the adoption process go smoothly, turn to Cofsky & Zeidman. Our New Jersey adoption attorney team is here to assist you with things like creating an open adoption agreement or filling out the right documents for an international adoption. We’ve helped families throughout the Haddonfield and Woodbury areas through the process of adoption. Learn more about our services by calling (856) 429-5005 or filling out our contact form.

How to Plan for Visitation With Your Child’s Birth Parent

How Do I Create a Visitation Plan With My Child’s Birth Parent?

In 2019, more than 64,000 children were adopted in the United States. According to the Congressional Coalition on Adoption, 52% of those children were adopted by their foster parents, and 36% were adopted by a relative. When planning an open adoption, no matter what the child’s age, creating a visitation agreement with the birth parent and a New Jersey adoption attorney may help your family have a smoother transition and better communication.

Consider the Type of Adoption

The only type of adoption that allows the birth parent to visit with their biological child is an open adoption. The open adoption process requires careful navigation and planning, which is why it’s best to work with a New Jersey adoption attorney. In an open adoption, the adoptive parent or parents may choose to allow the birth mother or biological father of the child to occasionally or regularly communicate with their child through specific types of interactions at a specific frequency and through certain methods.

Determine the Timing of Communications

A very young child may not understand the difference between biological and adoptive parents. They may become confused or develop attachment disorders or other mental health issues if they don’t understand who their parents are. Some adoptive families choose to limit the child’s in-person interactions with the birth parents until the child is old enough to understand that they were adopted and their biological parents are different from the people who adopted them.

 

VeryWell Family suggests telling a child they are adopted by the age of 3. Use words the child can understand. Working with a child psychologist may help with this process.

Plan Which Types of Communication Are Allowed

Thanks to technology, there are many ways a birth parent can interact with their biological child and the child’s adoptive family. Consider how you want these interactions to take place. You might think about sending digital photos, setting up video calls, sending text messages or emailing. Phone calls and snail mail also facilitate regular communication between a birth parent and their biological child.

Decide on Visitation Times

For in-person visitation, consider which times and how frequently you want them to occur. Special events in a child’s life, such as their first birthday, first day of school or first school play may be of interest to their birth parent. The birth parent might want to see the child on their birthday or on religious holidays. Decide what you feel comfortable with, such as a two-hour visit on the child’s birthday.

Include Visitation Locations

The location of visits with your child and their birth parent matters. Your child may feel more comfortable at a neutral place, such as a children’s museum, counselor’s office or similar setting. If you’re comfortable, you could have the birth parent visit your child in your home.

Consider the Child’s Preferences

As the child gets older, you may want to reconsider the visitation agreement. Your child might wish to see their birth parent more or less frequently as they get older. They may have an idea of how they want to spend their birthdays, school breaks and other special events and days. Including your child in the process could help reduce confusion, resentment and negative feelings toward you or their birth parent.

 

If you’re considering an open adoption, speaking with a New Jersey adoption attorney will help you understand your rights and the rights of the birth parents. Knowing how to set up a visitation agreement with the birth parent also give you information about what to expect in the future for your family. To learn more or to schedule a consultation with the law firm of Cofsky & Zeidman, call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005 or our Woodbury office at (856) 845-2555. You can also complete our online contact form, and our associate will reach out to you to schedule a consultation.

Do International Surrogacies Give Children Dual Citizenship?

Does an International Surrogacy Mean Dual Citizenship for Your Child?

The U.S. State Department has long upheld a policy that denied citizenship to those who were born via surrogacy or IVF (in vitro fertilization), preventing children who were born in this way from obtaining dual citizenship. But now, thanks to the recent update in the department’s policy regarding how they handle these types of cases, it’s now more possible than ever for children who were born with a surrogate parent or in vitro fertilization to become U.S. citizens.

A Highly Restrictive Previous Policy

Previously, State Department policy prevented children born abroad by assisted means — e.g., international surrogacies — to obtain citizenship. The only circumstance that would then allow for the child to become a U.S. citizen is if one of the parents is already a legal citizen and the child is directly related to them. This applied to children who were born outside of the U.S. by way of assisted reproductive methods, most commonly a surrogate or in vitro fertilization, to both heterosexual and same-sex parents.

New Rules More in Touch With Reality

This new policy was announced on May 18, 2021, and it does set some stipulations. In order for your situation to be applicable to this new policy, your child has to have been born outside of the United States, and the parents must be married. Additionally, one or both of the child’s parents must already be a citizen of the U.S., and the child has to be biologically related to one of their parents.

 

A statement put out by the State Department praised the update to the way that the Immigration and Nationality Act is applied. The department says it’s now considering realistically what the families of today are truly going through. There have also been numerous advancements that have come in technology for assisted reproductive means, changing the way these policies must be thought of and implemented.

 

These newly-adopted guidelines are effectively a reversal of a long-standing rule that had obvious issues. The previous policy classified any child born through surrogacy outside of the United States as being born out of wedlock, even though the child’s parents were actually married. It was also a requirement of the State Department for children born outside the U.S. to be genetically or gestationally related to the parent who was a U.S. citizen.

A Well-Disputed Old Policy

This has led to a handful of same-sex couples filing lawsuits due to the former policy, fighting for their children’s rights to legal citizenship in the United States. Over the course of two years, two cases were brought and won by parents in this situation against the Trump administration.

 

In June 2020, a federal judge’s ruling required the State Department to recognize a same-sex couple’s daughter as a legal citizen. She was a year old at the time, born in via surrogacy in Canada.

 

Another instance of a successful case challenging the old rule, taking the fight to court, involved twin boys. The Canadian-born twins were the children of a same-sex couple, where one of the children was genetically tied to his father, who was a citizen of the United States. This child was granted his citizenship. His twin brother, on the other hand, relationally tied to the father who was born in Israel, was not allowed to become a citizen.

 

In 2019, the judge presiding over that case made the ruling that this child was, in fact, a U.S. citizen due to the fact that he had married parents. In this case, the ruling was that the State Department hadn’t applied its own law correctly.

A Big Moment for the LGBTQ Community

With the new law, LGBTQ parents are all feeling a momentous breakthrough. It’s a huge win for everyone who’d been fighting back against the State Department’s previous policy, which was dehumanizing, out of touch, and above all, unconstitutional.

 

Immigration Equality is one of the outstanding LGBTQ immigration rights groups that has brought a number of federal lawsuits that challenge the old rules of the State Department. They work with New Jersey lawyers to help provide what’s best for these children.

 

This new policy sends a clear message to the public, especially those in LGBTQ communities, that unity and determination are both powerful tools against systemic discrimination. It underlines the idea that families are formed from love, not from genetics.

 

If you or a loved one are in this type of a situation, call the firm of Cofsky & Zeidman, L.L.C., at (856) 429-5005. Donald Cofsky is a friendly, knowledgeable, and experienced New Jersey lawyer who will guide you through every step of the process to help your child become a dual citizen.

What Should You Include in a Surrogacy Contract?

How to Write a Good Surrogacy Contract

In the past 20 years, the number of parents who use surrogates to expand their family has drastically increased. Though surrogacy is certainly becoming more popular, it’s still not a hassle-free process. If you want to avoid any problems later on, it is a good idea to include these items in your surrogacy contract.

A Clear Definition of What Type of Surrogacy You Are Using

Start your contract by making sure you know what type of surrogacy your family plans on using. Legally speaking, there is a difference between traditional surrogacy, where a woman donates an egg and carries the child to term, and gestational carrying, which involves a woman carrying to term a fetus that does not have her genetic material. Keep in mind that New Jersey surrogacy law does not acknowledge pre-birth surrogacy contracts in cases of traditional surrogacy. You can write a document to clarify things and express every party’s intentions, but it won’t be valid in court.

The Carrier’s Consent to Carry a Child and Surrender It After Birth

The surrogate contract is a way for your chosen gestational carrier to formally acknowledge the situation. They will need to sign clauses that state that they agree to attempt to carry and give birth to the child. To be a valid surrogacy contract, the carrier also needs to acknowledge that they will surrender custody of the child after birth. This is one of the most important provisions for your New Jersey adoption attorney to include in the whole document.

The Intended Parents’ Accepting of Responsibility for the Child

Another essential provision in any surrogate agreement is both intended parents stating that they will accept legal custody of the child after birth. Even intended parents who contributed genetic material to the child will need to be listed in this part of the document. Furthermore, the contract needs to say that you accept sole responsibility for the child. This allows your names to be put on the child’s birth certificate, and it absolves the gestational carrier of any duty to the child.

Descriptions of How Both Parties Will Handle Medical Care

The contract should acknowledge that the gestational carrier has the right to make their own medical decisions during the pregnancy. It’s a good idea for the contract to include a requirement for the surrogate to notify intended parents of her plans in writing. The contract should also discuss how the parents plan on paying the surrogate for her medical care. Things like insurance policies, doctor’s bills, or cash compensation should be discussed.

Whether the Intended Parents Will Pay for Living Expenses

Technically speaking, the only compensation that the intended parents have to make is for the surrogate’s lawyer and medical care. However, they are also allowed to pay for the surrogate’s living expenses during the surrogacy process. In most cases, gestational carriers will only agree to the process if they do get appropriate compensation. Make sure that your contract clearly lays out what expenses you will pay for and how often you will pay them. Some families provide a monthly allowance while others may want to reimburse the surrogate after the pregnancy.

The Timeline for the Surrogacy Process

In any surrogacy contract, more clarity is always a good thing. You should spell out all expectations and consider all potential problems. This can avoid conflicts or confusion later on. Start by discussing where and how the implantation process will occur. Clearly state how many times you will attempt the implantation process and what you will do if the process fails. You can also use the contract to describe whether or not you want to try again if the pregnancy results in a miscarriage or stillbirth. The contract can also help you discuss how long the surrogate has access after birth and whether she can contact the child later on.

A well-drafted surrogacy contract protects both the surrogate and the intended parents. At Cofsky & Zeidman, our New Jersey adoption attorney can help you write and file all necessary surrogate paperwork. To schedule a consultation at one of our Pennsylvania or New Jersey offices, call 856-429-5005. You can also talk to our team by filling out our contact form.

What It Takes to Adopt a Grandchild

Everything You Should Understand About Grandparent Adoption

While it’s common for grandparents to act as temporary caregivers for their grandchildren during a time when one or both parents may be unable to provide the necessary level of care, it may be better to formalize an adoption in certain situations. In 2015 alone, around 1,063 adoptions were finalized, many of which were grandparent adoptions. Before the adoption process begins, it’s important to know what your legal rights are in New Jersey.

When to Consider a Kinship Legal Guardianship

When you want to become a permanent caregiver of your grandchild, one option available to you is to become a kinship legal guardian, which is possible in the event that adoption is unlikely to be granted. Temporary caregivers have the ability to petition the court to obtain status as a kinship legal guardian, which makes it possible for birth parents to continue having certain legal rights. These legal rights include the responsibility to offer financial support and the right to occasionally visit the child.

Someone who obtains this form of guardianship will be the main person responsible for the child but will not be overseen by the Division of Child Protection and Permanency (DCP&P), which is a requirement for foster placements. Even though the DCP&P doesn’t oversee these guardianships, you could still be eligible for caregiver subsidies as well as similar types of assistance.

Look Into Temporary Foster Placement

One option to consider in accordance with the DCP&P is a temporary foster placement, which can either lead to a parent-child reunification or you being a permanent caregiver through adoption or guardianship. DCP&P will consider this option for grandparents who are able to provide the same level of care as standard foster parents while also providing the child with a safe environment.

The DCP&P believes that placing a child with someone they know and are close to can lessen the amount of trauma that typically occurs when being separated from a parent. It’s important to understand that the main goal for all of these options is to ensure that the child is able to adjust well to the situation on a long-term basis.

The process for temporary placement is similar to the adoption process but with a few less requirements. Along with a comprehensive home inspection, background checks will also be performed on any household member who’s at least 18 years old. You will need to obtain a license that allows you to act as a “resource parent” in New Jersey. While foster parents have certain legal rights, DCP&P supervision is still necessary.

Parental Rights to Consider During Grandparent Adoptions

When it comes to New Jersey adoption requirements, the law states that a child is only able to have two legal parents, which can make it difficult for a grandparent to adopt their grandchild. However, it’s possible for a third individual to gain rights as a legal guardian or foster parent in the event that they are taking care of the child in question.

Legal adoption of a child is only possible if the biological parents voluntarily relinquish the parental rights they have. The courts may also terminate these rights in certain situations. Parental rights can be terminated in New Jersey if a parent abuses or abandons their child. Child neglect or abuse can occur by abandoning a child, causing emotional or physical harm, not providing a proper level of care, sexually abusing a child, or using excessive amounts of physical punishment.

Once rights have been terminated, it’s possible for a grandparent to go through the adoption process. When the adoption has been properly finalized, the grandparent will gain all parental responsibilities and rights. As for the birth parents, they no longer have parental rights and can only visit the child if the adoptive parents agree.

How Our New Jersey Adoption Lawyer Can Help

During our many years in practice, our New Jersey adoption lawyer has represented over 1,500 families throughout the adoption process. The experience we have allows us to provide our clients with the representation they deserve. We can help you by streamlining the entire adoption process, which should reduce your stress levels and allow you to better understand what the process entails.

Our lawyer will assist you in gaining a more in-depth knowledge of your legal rights in regard to the adoption case you’re involved in. Keep in mind that we handle every type of adoption, which includes everything from international adoptions to grandparent adoptions.

If you would like to begin the adoption process and want to make sure that your interests are protected during the process, call our New Jersey adoption lawyer today at (856) 429-5005 or fill out our online form to get started.

Is Adoption or Surrogacy Right for You?

Adoption vs. Surrogacy: Weighing the Options

About 2,000 children are typically in New Jersey’s foster care system waiting to be adopted, and the number of surrogacy cases is also skyrocketing. In fact, demand for surrogates is currently outstripping the supply in some areas. However, deciding which alternative family expansion route is right for you can be challenging.

Genetic Connections

Biological connections are sacred to some people. If you’ve always dreamed of having kids with your smile or your partner’s eyes or a laugh like your great aunt Shirley, surrogacy is likely the best choice. This can be tough to admit, but it’s important to be as honest with yourself as possible. After all, if you cannot fully accept a child that doesn’t share a biological link, adoption isn’t a fair or wise choice. Your disappointment may manifest in implicit ways and have a negative psychological impact on the adopted child.

Many couples deciding between adoption and surrogacy often worry that it will be more difficult to “bond” with newborns that don’t share their DNA. This is not the case. Love is love, and the moment adoptive parents clap eyes on their new bundles of joy, the same affectionate feelings and protective instincts kick in, just like biological parents.

Budget Considerations

No matter how it happens, having a baby is expensive. Adopting through a public service can cost anywhere between $1,000 and $15,000, depending on the program and whether or not you choose to use a New Jersey adoption attorney. Private adoptions may cost between $40,000 and $50,000.

Surrogacy is the most expensive option. It usually sets donors back between $75,000 and $150,000 because they’re expected to pay for surrogates’ related medical expenses in addition to compensation for carrying the children. In some situations, couples also pay surrogate living expenses.

When considering your budget, don’t forget to factor in the expense of having a newborn baby and the related equipment. The average middle-class family spends between $20,000 and $50,000 on newborns in their first year of life.

Navigating Relationships

Another dynamic to consider when choosing between surrogacy and adoption is the type of relationship that you want to have with the birth partner. Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Do you want to know the birthing parent or partner?
  • Would you be comfortable maintaining a relationship with the birthing parent after the baby is born?
  • Would you be comfortable with your child having a relationship with a biological parent down the road?
  • Do you want a relationship with the birth partner during pregnancy?
  • How are you planning to discuss your decision with your family, friends, and, eventually, the child?

If you choose to go the adoption route, you may or may not be given information about the biological parents. In days of old, most adoptions were closed, meaning that the birth parents’ identities were never revealed. These days, however, the overwhelming majority of adoptions are open, and birth parents maintain some level of contact with the adoptive parents. Sometimes, the biological parents simply get pictures and updates once a year but never meet the children. Other agreements give the birth parents visitation rights after an adjustment period, which usually lasts several years, so the family has time to bond.

With surrogacy, the relationship typically ends with the gestational carrier after the child is born. Moreover, donor parents usually have a say in certain aspects of the pregnancy. Typical agreements include prohibitions against smoking, drugs, and drinking. Some even include healthy eating guidelines.

Some surrogates, however, are people who are close to the adopting couple, like a sister or close friend. In this case, the surrogate is almost always in the baby’s life as a type of aunt figure who becomes a close part of the baby’s life.

Couples deciding between adoption and surrogacy may benefit from a consultation with New Jersey adoption attorney Donald Cofsky of Cofsky & Zeidman. If you have questions about surrogacy or adoption, contact our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005 or our office in Woodbury at (856) 845-2555.

Does the Biological Parent Have to Consent to a Stepparent Adoption?

Can a Biological Parent Block a Stepparent Adoption?

About 5% of all children with a stepparent end up getting adopted by their stepparent. This sort of adoption can be challenging to navigate since it brings up sensitive topics like former relationships and child custody. Whether or not the biological parent consents to the adoption plays a big role in the eventual outcome.

Stepparent Adoption Requires One Parent to Give Up Parental Rights

To understand why consent is such a big issue, it’s necessary to understand New Jersey adoption law. Legally speaking, a child can only have two parents. Therefore, if a stepparent wants to adopt the child, they need more than the consent of the parent they are married to. They also need to be stepping into a role that was vacated by the other parent.

In the simplest cases, this happens due to death. Once one biological parent has died, the spouse of the remaining parent can adopt the children. They could do this even if the deceased parent stated that they did not give consent to an adoption in the past.

If the biological parent is still alive, their consent matters. Without them voluntarily giving up parental rights, it can be very difficult for a stepparent to adopt your child. Even if the biological parent does not have custody, they may still be able to block an adoption.

How to Get Consent for Stepparent Adoption

Most cases of stepparent adoption start with a simple conversation between the child’s current legal parents. If the stepparent and their spouse can convince the other person to give up their rights, the process just involves paperwork. The parent will need to fill out a voluntary surrender of parental rights form and submit it to the court.

To simplify the process, a New Jersey adoption lawyer will usually submit these forms alongside the other adoption forms. Once the surrender of rights form is accepted by the court, it entirely removes any responsibility from the biological parent. They do not have to pay for child support or care for the child. They will also be giving up their rights to see the child or have a say in the child’s upbringing.

How to Finalize an Adoption Without Consent

If a biological parent does not agree to consent, the other parent and their spouse have the option of trying to forcibly remove the parent’s rights. This tends to be a very challenging process. Instead of just filing paperwork, the parents have to go to court and argue their case in front of a judge.

To remove parental rights and clear the way for adoption, they will need to prove the biological parent is an unfit parent. This is very challenging because the burden of proof is on the parents who want to adopt. Most family courts want to preserve parental rights whenever possible, so they are not likely to side with the stepparent unless there is clear proof. Some potential reasons to remove parental rights include:

  • The parent has been convicted of a major crime
  • There is reasonable proof the parent has been abusive
  • The parent has neglected the child when the child was in their care
  • The parent has extensive substance abuse problems and won’t seek treatment
  • The parent has abandoned their child and cannot be found
  • The parent has not made an effort to see or financially support the child

Stepparent adoptions are often portrayed as a simpler type of adoption, but as you can see, there are still a lot of technicalities to consider. If you are involved in a stepparent adoption situation, it’s a good idea to seek legal counsel. As a leading New Jersey adoption lawyer, Donald Cofsky is here to help. The team at Cofsky & Zeidman can assist you with everything from filing legal paperwork to arguing your case in court. We have offices in Haddonfield, Woodbury, and Philadelphia. If you would like to schedule a consultation with us, dial 856-429-5005 or fill out our contact form.

Is an Open Adoption Right for You?

Exploring the Pros and Cons of Open Adoption

In general, 60% to 70% of adoptions are open. This style of adoption involves the adoptive family and birth family continuing to stay in contact as the child grows up. To see if it will work for your situation, it can be helpful to learn a little about the pros and cons of this adoption type.

Pro: Children Don’t Feel Like They’re Missing Anything

No matter how much love and care you provide your child, the reality is that they did lose an important connection to their past. When a child never gets to see or hear about their birth family, they end up with a lot of questions. An open adoption can help reduce this feeling of having a “missing piece.”

It is fairly common for adoptive children to build up a fantasy when they are not in contact with their birth family. They may romanticize their birth family, obsess over what their life would have been like, or feel like they are missing out on something. Keeping contact with the birth family can help reassure the child that they are in the right place.

Con: Conflicts Between the Two Families

Adoption can be an intensely emotional journey, so there is always some possibility of drama. Adding a second family to the mix may result in some disagreements. Often, the main struggle is just navigating poverty, mental health issues, drug use, or other problems that led to the adoption in the first place.

There can also be conflict due to mismatched expectations. The birth family may be unhappy about the way you choose to raise your child, or you may be unhappy with how much impact the birth family has. Some parents may feel anxious or worried about the idea of their child preferring the birth family, so they might lash out and cause more conflict.

Pro: Children Stay More Connected With Their Background

Contact with the birth family can be especially helpful in cross-cultural adoptions. If the child is of a different race than the adoptive parents, their birth family can provide some perspective on challenges the child might face. Open adoptions also help children to connect more closely with their roots and learn about their genetic background.

This information on your child’s heritage can give them a very valuable sense of stability. It can also help you to better equip your child for a future where they may face discrimination or judgement.

Con: Birth Parents May Struggle to Maintain Appropriate Boundaries

This is often the biggest fear adoptive parents have with an open adoption. Parents worry that open adoptions may make it easier for a birth parent to try to diminish their parental role. The reality is a little more nuanced. Most birth parents are not interested in trying to outright take over your parental responsibilities.

However, there can be awkward instances, like a birth parent showing up unannounced or contacting your child without your knowledge. To prevent this from happening, it can be helpful to have a New Jersey adoption attorney create a clear agreement that schedules visits, calls, and other contact.

Pro: Children Have a Wider Support Circle

Having more people around who love your child is always a good thing. For some families, an open adoption just means a visit every couple of years. However, for some families, open adoption can create some truly special relationships.

Many birth parents are happy to take on the role of a distant relative or family friend. It can mean more people at birthday parties, more holiday presents, and more special memories. This can provide a valuable sense of love and support for your child.

Ultimately, this type of a procedure can help to mitigate some of the stress associated with adoption, but it is important to establish very clear boundaries. This is where Cofsky & Zeidman of Haddonfield can help. Our New Jersey adoption attorney firm can assist you with navigating all the legal agreements of open adoptions. We provide legal support for all types of adoptions, assisted reproductions, and more. Call us at 856-429-5005 or fill out our contact form to set up an appointment.

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